Must Read: CONTROLLED - Season 1 - Episode 22

7 years ago

Must Read: CONTROLLED - Season 1 - Episode 22

Sophia:

I la!d in the bed, curled up and crying in
pain. My whole body was sore and
throbbing. Ricky was behind me, gently
running his finger from my shoulder to my
elbow, and back again. Every time I
scooted away from him, he would pull me
back violently. I learned to just stay where
I was and put up with it.

“I’ll never forgive you for this,” I whispered,
not bothering to look at him. He laughed
and continued to trace my shoulder.

“It’s okay, Sophie. There’s nothing to
forgive. I’m not sorry for what I did.” I
could hear him smiling as he laughed.

I was burning with rage, but tried not to
show it.

I sat up and swung my legs off of the bed,
and in an instant he wrapped his arm
around my waist, pulling me away from
the edge. “You’re not going anywhere.”

“Not even to the bathroom?”
He thought for a moment, then let me go.

“You have two minutes.”

Sighing, I got up from the bed and crossed
the room to the bathroom. I closed the
door behind me, then locked it. I sat on
the counter, putting my head in my hands
and softly crying. I heard a knock at the
door, followed by Ricky’s gentle voice.

“Sophie? Are you okay?”
I wiped the tears from my eyes and
cheeks and picked my head up, trying to
sound normal. “No,” I said, my voice
cracking.

“Sophie, come out.”
There was a warning in his voice, causing
me to shake slightly. I walked over to the
door and unlocked it, then opened it a
little. “What do you want?” I asked, not
making eye contact. He put his hand on
the door and pushed it open all the way.

He then brought me into his arms, and I
had to force myself not to push away.

“You’ll get used to it, Sophie. I promise,”
he whispered into my hair. He kissed the
top of my head and continued hugging
me.

“That’s what you said last time. I’ll never
get used to this,” I blurted out before I
could stop myself. He tightened his grip
around me, making it hard to breathe.

“You will get used to this, Sophie. There’s
no running away this time. We’re over a
hundred miles away from civilization.

There isn’t anywhere to go for you.”
“I don’t care. I’ll never get used to this,” I
repeated. I finally had enough and placed
my hands on his bare chest, then shoved,
pushing him away from me. He was
caught off guard and he stumbled
backwards, falling onto the bed. I backed
up unto the bathroom and closed it, then
quickly locked it before he could open it.

Seconds later he was pounding at the
door, but I stayed where I was, standing in
the middle of the bathroom, watching the
door. I didn’t even blink when he pounded
on it; I just watched. The wood began to
split, and the he barged in. The wooden
door was separated from its hinges, lying
on the floor of the bathroom.

He walked over to me and slapped me, but
I did nothing about it. He gripped both of
my arms and sq££zed tightly, and I
winced slightly, not making any eye
contact with him.

“Why do you have to be so difficult?” he
yelled. I didn’t answer him; I just kept
looking at the ground.

“Answer me, Sophie!”
Silence.
“Sophie!”
Another smack, but I still didn’t speak.

“God dammit, Sophie! Speak to me!”
I finally felt a wave of anger wash through
me. Anger burning in my eyes, I snapped
my head up to look at him. He was taken
by surprise, but held eye contact.

“Get off of me!” I pushed at him again and
he let go. He didn’t come at me again, to
my relief. “The reason I won’t talk to you
is because no matter what I say, no
matter what I want, you still get things
your way! If it’s not your way, you hit me!

You call that love, Ricky? Raping me once
again, giving me bruises and smacking me
across the face do hard you leave marks?”
He stood there, shocked and hurt, but I
knew he also felt guilty as everything I
said sunk in. I took a deep breath and
continued.

“That’s not love, Ricky! I can’t even begin
to tell you how many times I’ve told you
that! You just don’t seem to listen to me,
the person you claim to ‘ love ’!” I yelled,
putting air quotes around the last word.

“Let me just inform you right now that I
will never, and I repeat never love you! The
only person I will ever love is Justin! He
actually cares about me, and doesn’t hurt
others I care about. You need to get a life,
Ricky, and maybe some common sense
while you’re at it. You’ve been doing this
to me for over a year! Give up already! Get
a clue!”

I stopped yelling and stood there, panting.

I couldn’t believe I just said all of that
stuff to him, but I did, and there was no
taking it back. I watched his eyes grow
from surprised to cold and filled with
hatred.

“Sophie…” he said. “I never wanted to do
this. I really hoped it wouldn’t have come
to this. But you’ve made it clear.” He took
a deep breath.
“You’re not the one.”
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