Number 225, Katakata Street (A Story By Centino) - Season 1 - Episode 7

6 years ago

Number 225, Katakata Street (A Story By Centino) - Season 1 - Episode 7

THE SEX TAPE

The following morning Irikefe walked up to me where I stood by the gutter brushing my teeth and said “Bros, I have the tape.”

“What tape again?”

“Sister Esther and The Undertaker last night.”

“You are joking right? I said and spat a dollop of toothpaste foam with phlegm into the gutter and it landed with a splatter. I rinsed my mouth with the water I held in a plastic cup and spat again and then faced Irikefe.

“Bros since you came to this compound, have I ever said I will do something and not do it? Or have I ever given you information that is not authentic? I am the Prince here. Conceived, born, bred, buttered, riced and beansed in number 225. Nothing escapes my attention.”

“No be only riced and beansed. What of amala and ewedued in number 225?”

Irikefe laughed out loud and threw his head back without a care in the world while displaying a set of perfect dentition. He then pulled out his phone from his pocket and caressed it in his palm. He looked around like a thief about to remove a chicken from its roost and said “tell me you are not eager to watch.”

He smiled as I tried to conceal my excitement and said “Let’s go to your room. This place is not safe.”

I led him back through the corridor and we entered the room I shared with my cousin. We both sat on the bed – a six by four feet mattress on cold linoleum dressed with the wrapper my mother gave me as I packed for Lagos.

Irikefe dipped his hand in his pocket but hesitated.

“Show me nau?” I said. He then held up the phone and fiddled with it and then said “oya, see.”

I looked at the still black screen with indecipherable humming sound as irikefe watched me.

“What is this?”

“That is the show na. Can’t you hear Sister Esther speaking in tongues? The Undertaker is even quoting Songs of Solomon.”

“I can’t see or hear a thing.”

“That is because there was no light.”

“But that is the point Irikefe. How can you make a video in the dark? And even if you had made an actual video, what would you do with it? What is the point?”

“I will use it to make money from them.”

“Blackmail?”

“Yes ke.”

“How can you even think of that?”

“I am now a yahoo boy. I don’t care.”

“So you want to start your criminal life with blackmailing your neighbors?”

“Charity begins at home bros.”

“Well, sorry you have started woefully. There is nothing on this so called tape of yours.”

“They will not know that. My night vigil will not go in vain. I was by the window till they took light by twelve thirty. I then came round and entered the corridor and waited to make sure I saw The Undertaker sneak into her room. As long as they slept together, they will believe I have a tape.”

“It was dark irikefe.”

“I will tell them I recorded it using anti-darkness infrared technology.”

“What the hell is that?”

“I don’t know bros. It just entered my head. Sister Esther only knows what the Bible says. I will tell her that I can put it on a special device and the world will see her holy behind being polished by a heathen.”

“Mr Kingsley will not buy this.”

“I am not going to him. He will even be glad there is wahala. That will be a good excuse to dump her. He is tired of the whole thing.”

“And how do you know that?”

“I know everything bros.”

“So you want Sister Esther to give you money?”

Something like that. I know she is poor like the rest of us. But I can be getting something to be buying data for my business. Either that or I go to her pastor with the tape.”

“Do you know her pastor?”

“She once took me to him for deliverance.”

“Obviously it did not work.”

Irikefe chucked and I could see he was enjoying my discomfort.

“Bros, one needs to be wise in this Lagos. With time, I will keep a big bowl with her. When she finishes cooking, after serving The Undertaker she will serve me too.”

“You will eat rat poison.”

“Hehehe it’s a chance I’m willing to take.”