Must Read: Me And My Guys (18+)

6 years ago

Must Read: Me And My Guys (18+)

I was shaken inwardly but didnt allow joe see that. We laughed and joke together. I excused my self from the parlour and went into the kitchen to get my dlck prepared for the contest ahead.

Ya, alomo. Joe gave me to me, there were five all together, it was his gift to me. I went in and made sure i drained off all the liquid content in it.

The is a “WISE” saying that says “HE WHO DRINKS ALOMO BITTERS WITHOUT A FROWN ON HIS/HER FACE, IS CAPABLE OF MURDER” well!!!! If that saying is true, then i am capable of murder. I drank alomo that night with a smile on my face.

Why wouldnt i smile when i was to be serve with a good and sweet dinner. If only ill be alive to tell the tale.

“God into your hands i commit my dlck” i prayed silently as i uncorked the 2nd bottle of alomo. I took two sips and pocketed the rest in my back pocket as i walked out through the kitchen door.

On getting back to the sitting room, joe was unclad , save for his stinky i-was-once-white boxer, which he washed once in a blue moon.

He was on the sofa, singing war songs.

I wonder how he was going to fvck with his sick condition.
“hahahahaha you go drink aloomo e no go work oo” he had smelt the scent.
“i dey ready naw na” i said flexing some muscles. He laughed more.
“no be alomo wey john drink fvck diz same girl? D guy faint if no be say i bin dey house e for go oo”
ehhhh? Wetin i hear? Chai my own don finish.I hissed.
“so because say the girl conquer john im go conqure me? Chai see insult, you know who i be? Eeehh?” i said knacking my chest.

Alomo had taken control.

Joe only shrugged his head, maybe pitying me.

He didnt know the amount of alomo i drank. if he knew, e no go dey talk rubbish.
We started debating on who was stronger between me and the big headed john.

John was strong no doubt, his only weak point was on bed. He was a one minute guy.
Why would he compare me with him.

During the argument, i had a call. I checked, mrs sandra was calling. I told joe sandra was calling, he hurried to my side to listen to the conversation. I wonder how she got my number cause i couldnt remember me giving her my digits. Ohh i retrieved back my sim
I picked the call at the second ring.
“hello” the unmistaken voice of mrs sandra rang from the other end. I coughed and answered.
“hello ma, you have not yet sleep? It bad for your health o” she giggled.
“baby i have been thinking about you all day” she said sounding romantic. Wetin the do this one?
“mmmmm me too o” i replied.
“how is your night going and how about my proposal? Kk you will still be having your girlfriends and lovers, maybe that why you didnt give an answer” her statement surprised me and joe, so she expected me to commit my self to her? Mmmm talk to the deaf.

Me? Haaa e no for work.
“haa ma is no…..”
“you know how to get me angry abi?ok each time you call me ‘ma’ again you will ba punished” she said getting angry.
“sorry ma…” what! I just said it again. Joe laughed.
“you are making fun of me right?” she asked her voice shaking. Was she crying? No it cant be.
“who is that laughing? Infact…okay, maybe you will learn later. What your decision on the stuff?”
“ma i have not yet think about it an….”
“dont tell me that young man, infact leave it i dont want you again and never you step a foot in my company” she yelled.
[/B] “ma is n……”[/B] she hang up. I didnt want to call her. I planned meeting her the next day.

Joe was still laughing.
“wetin that woman want you no fit give am?” he had asked. I told him all that took place between me and sugar mummy.

He said i should accept the offer, saying if it was him he would have been the one to ask her.
“you just the dull package o na now you for buy car na, chop im money clean mouth tell am bye bye. Your mate get car” he said. I laughed.
“you be my mate na”
“ehh? Me your mate? I big pass you o me joe your mate? I see when your mama born you na”
“essssh i accept say you big pass me, why you no buy car?”
“i no like car o e to dey kill people, you wan make i die?”
“hahahahahaha you no like car? Comon job you no get”
“how i go get job when my father and mother still dey alive? Na popcy dey give me money na i no fit suffer o”
“na today i know say you be the latest goat for this uyo, you mad o. Because say your pale and male dey alive you no fit work? Me nko?”
“your own you dey suffer o. Make i tell you say money wey my pman dey give me plenty pass your salary, you too dey dull o” chai diz guy was definitely mad. Truelly “MANY ARE MAD, BUT FEW ARE ROAMING” joe was mad but wasnt roaming yet. How can a well human being say such things.
“i no know weda na your papa born you true true, e be lyk say your mama play away match, e go score….”
“you dey craze. I no be your mate no dey insult me” he warned pointing a finger.
“no wonder you no get work till now, what if your pman push comot now…..”
“na your pman go die amen back to sender amen” he began binding and casting.
“but seriously you don mad o you need yaba”
” you fvck pass me? I don fvck all the toto for this akwa ibom. No worry i go fvck all your sister” he said laughing.
“you dey mad, b—–d like you. Idiot. No try am ehh see you go fvck dem for grave” i said standing up.
“we go see shey na you go marry dem? You wey go fvck person sister for lagos nko?” he said still laughing.

I ignored those question as thoughts of chinyere flash through my mind. I havent call her since i came back.
“diz babe tey na why dem no come fast” joe said standing up too.
“ehheh tell me as e take happen wey ella do you diz kind tin” i said resting on the sofa.He sat down too.
“mmmm my brethren is not a small matter you see so” he said his chin on his palms.
[B] “tok na i dey hear. How the girl p—y dey sef. I no know why i no even fvck that geh that day wey im give me green light” i lamented.
“i tell you say you don dey dull. Wake up, you are not the Bluestarry i use to know. Wake up” he said placing his hands on my shoulders.