Must Read: Ibo Boy Wey Like Yoruba

6 years ago

Must Read: Ibo Boy Wey Like Yoruba

My balls were seriously giving me disturbing pains, so i went to Ilorin to ask him if he had anything i could apply that would relieve the pains. If only i could tell the future, i wouldn’t have gone to Ilorin’s room that night.

“Ilorin u get anything wey i go fit rub for this my b’lockus wey go make am stop to dey pain me?” i asked as i entered Ilorin’s room. “i get na, take dis tin” he said handing a stunt bottle container to me. “Rub dis tin for there, e go stop, nahim i rub wen i get boil for my n’yash, the boil com disappear one time” he added. “wetin be the name of dis tin na?” i asked. “the name na Aboniki, my uncle dey work for the company wey dey produce am, so anytime wey i go him house i dey collect plenty” Ilorin said. “how i go take use am na?” i inquired. “u go first baf, if u baf finish, u go com rub am, e go pepper u oh, but na only small e go pepper u” he responded. “i no want anything wey go pepper me oh” i said, “if e no pepper u that mean say e no work na? nahim make me say make u baf, if u baf com rub am, e no go pepper u pass 1minute, e go com stop and ur b’lockus sef go stop to pain u” he assured, not knowing he was f’ooling me. I was very happy i had gotten the final solution to the pains in my balls, not knowing i was holding a bottle that would bring me tears.

I took my bath, stared at the bottle and saw ABONIKI BALM written boldly on it. As i sat in my room alone, i had concluded that immediately after i had finished appling the “elixir” i would hit the bed and sleep, not knowing ABONIKI would murder my sleep that night.
I applied it on the affected area. I waited for 20seconds for the burning s£nsat!on Ilorin warned.

It started, it was increasing by every seconds count. “yeeeeh!!! I don die oh, dis thing dey pepper oh” i shouted.

The s£nsat!on increased, this time unbearable. “my b’lockus oh!! Ilorin don kill me oh!!” i shouted at the peak of my voice. I flung the Aboniki container on the floor and rushed out n*aked shouting, “Fire oh!!! Fire oh!!! Fire!!! Fire!!!”.

“where fire!!! where the fire!!” Angom shouted running towards me. “fire eeeh!! My b’lockus dey burn for fire oh!!” i cried pointing to my d’ick. Angom laughed uncontrollably.

“bring water oooh!!” i shouted at Angom. He searched all the buckets in the compound, but non was containing water.

As i ran to the bathroom, i saw a dirty looking bucket containing something that looked like water. I hurriedly poured the “water” on my body……………………. “Aaaaaah!!! S’hit water!!!” i cried out, as i remembered it was the same bucket Mama Alhaja always p’oo on bcos she couldn’t bend down to use our pit toilet.